Friday, 14 June 2013

Strawberries and Pineapple Under the Sea (Sconebob Jam Pants!)

Are you ready kids?
Aye Aye Captain!
I Can't hear you!
Aye Aye Captain!
oooooooooooooooh!

Strawberries and Pineapple under the Sea
SconeBob Jam Pants!
Tangy and scruptious, goes great with some tea!
Sconebob JamPants!
If delectable fruity be something you wish!
SconeBob JamPants!
Then whip up some cream and make it a dish!

SconeBob JamPants!
Ready?


SconeBob JamPants!SconeBob JamPants!SconeBob JamPants!
SconeBob JamPants!








We cheated slightly with this Jam and made it in our bread-maker. However, you can make it just as well in a pot. Boil together half a well minced pineapple, a punnet of diced strawberries, two table spoons of Jamsetta, a tablespoon of lemon juice and a cup of sugar. Boil vigorously for 15minutes after boiling point and pour into sterilised jars. BOOM! Strawberry and Pineapple Jam!

Thursday, 13 June 2013

Melon Rouge

Sugar, Fruit and Heat,
Sweet like Summer's kiss, 
Watermelon Jam.

Melon Rouge like Film,
The Land of the Rising Pun, 
Watermelon Jam.

Great on Scones and Toast, 
Better with Whipped Cream and Tea, 
Watermelon Jam.




Boil together 4 cups of pureed watermelon, three cups of sugar, one and a half packets of Pectin (Jamsetta) and half a cup of Lemon juice. Boil together for approximately 15 minutes after boiling point and pour into clean sterilised jars.  BOOM! Watermelon Jam.

Sunday, 9 June 2013

Grape Expectations

A grape is an encore fruit. A vine of second chances, do-overs, and fresh starts.  Stems of saccharine spheres, crowded like amorphous clouds of ashen green and violet. You bite into a rotten, mushy apple, you have only a rotten, mushy apple in your hand. You bite into a rotten, mushy grape, you need only to pluck another from a neighbouring branch in the hopes of a better one. A grape should grow within your soul a ripe vintage of optimism and compassion. One or two rotten grapes do not doom the bunch, but rather serve to amplify those grapes that take you back to summer snacking, fruit salads, PB&J’s, and family breakfasts. There is always another grape.







 Mix 500g of thinly sliced grapes with a cup of sugar and two tablespoons of Jam Setta, add heat and time, and you have a delectable spread where no grape is left behind. 

  


 Each bite of grape jam-slathered toast shouts with a resounding “Grape!” on your tastebuds. No alarms, no surprises. Take a bow, grape. You deserve it.

Wednesday, 5 June 2013

Orange you glad it's not Chinese Gooseberry Marmalade

Who doesn't fancy a spot of Marmalade on a Sunday afternoon? Nothing goes down better with sweet milky tea than a tart fruit jam, spread thickly on toast. Marmalade takes me back to my childhood. Marmalade sandwhiches for afternoon tea, a marmalade cat called Rusty and belting out what we thought was "Pretty Lady Marmalade" with Christina Aguilera. Ah yes, the joys of pure, traditional conservative conserves (in a non-puritan way). 

But this Jam adventure goes back farther than that. It starts with a remarkable unmarketable fruit known as the Chinese Gooseberry. Fascinating as the fruit was, with its bright green flesh and awkward brown fur coat, it had no place amongst the strawberries and plums of the day. Furthermore, with a name like 'Chinese Gooseberry' it seemed more foreign and alienable than ever.

Enter New Zealand, good old fashioned f'sh and ch'ps New Zealand, and names the buggers 'Kiwifruit'. They become an overnight sensation, suddenly a fruit that is safely exotic. People want to try the wonders of the world with the security of a developed nation in it's name.

In a way we provide this safety in our Jam. The bizarre quality of kiwifruit mellowed with the sweet tang of traditional British Marmalade. We are New Zealand, slowly expanding the tastes of the world one name change at a time. We are mixing society, mixing fruit and making Jam! We are fighting for the marginalised Chinese Gooseberry!!

....But also kiwifruit was on sale at our local Jewish grocer.
Jews are like kiwifruit. In some regard.

Sunday, 2 June 2013

Hot Monday in March Jam

A few months ago, during the great eastern heatwave, we retreated to the air-conditioned oasis of our local Asian Grocer. It was here that we chanced upon the peculiar American beverage known as Kool-Aid. The juice was strawberry and kiwifruit flavoured; and, though I was initially perplexed at this strange concoction, it soon became apparent that pure genius was swirling around in my mouth. And so it came to pass that we should find the inspiration for our very first jam on a hot Monday in March.

We used 500g of strawberries and 200g of kiwifruit. Add one cup of sugar and two tablespoons of JamSetta.
Unfortunately, at this early stage of our Jam making adventures, we had barely taken to documenting the process and these two photos are all that remains of that wonderful summer Jam. Though it appears a murky brown preserve, 'twas actually a deep ruby red strewn with little black freckles of kiwi.